[Steve]

How comfortable are you using English? What are the situations where you feel good about your English? What are the situations where you wish you had a better grasp of the language?

[悠游]

Hi, Steve,

This is my brief answer:

Q1:When I read or speak to myself
Q2:when I talk to somebody I know and with a comfortable start
Q3:no one speaks my own languag. When I open my mouth, English is the only language I can choose.

[Orion]

Hi Steve,

I think 悠游 summarized pretty well.
For Q3, my situation is when I am the only one as a non-native English speaker.

Thanks.

Orion

[No brainer]

When I need to talk, I just starting talking without hesitation. When I have to shut up, I do so without giving it a second thought. Hahaha, that's it. Well, joke.

When I can catch the dirtiest joke put up by my co-workers, I know I've got stuck too deeply in this language. Then I need to take a break. Well, joke again...huh.

[Steve]

The first question asks to what extent you feel comfortable speaking English? The answer should be something like, never, on occasion or always.

The fact that you feel uncomfortable if you are surrounded by English speakers is something you need to overcome. Try to just enjoy communicating!

I can be surrounded by Chinese, French or Japanese speakers and I just see myself as one of them. Of course, I speak those languages well.

But if I am surrounded by Korean speakers all speaking Korean, and I am struggling to understand and speak, I am still only conscious of the fact that we are communicating. I am happy to have the opportunity to be with these people.

Just learn to communicate and be happy when you are communicating.

What I wanted to know was the following. What kind of situations make you particularly uncomfortable in English? Is the school parent-teacher's meeting, at work, in the store, at the doctor's office, talking to your landlord, buying a car or what?

Any comments?

[lily]

When will you feel uncomfortable? When you think yourself speak very clearly, but it seems others do not understand you, you may start to feel uncomfortable. You may wonder if it is because your English is not good enough, or if it is because you have a strong accent, etc..

A couple of weeks ago, I went to IKEA. I saw a couch there and I asked a saleslady if there are other colors available. I thought I spoke to her very clearly. But she, a white lady, seemed puzzled by my simple question. So I repeated my question. She dared to say "sorry, I don't understand what you meant." I was almost fainted then. After a while, I found another salesman. He answered all my questions and even gave me some nice suggestion. Obviously we had a very pleasant chat in English.

Usually I believe one's uncomfortable feeling comes from the other party's expression or body language. 悠游's 1st reply was so true. Whenver you speak or read to yourself, you will always feel comfortable.

[Steve]

Very interesting. Body language is important. If you are tense, you make the other person tense. The question is how to overcome this tension.

The first thing is to work on natural phrasing. Natural phrases are more important than perfect pronunciation. If I wrtei smotehnig adn mispsell it, yuo cna stlil udnresntad fi teh prhesa is croretc. The same is true with pronunciation. Mispronounce but use a natural phrase and you will be understood.

So work on correct phrasing. Prepare appropriate phrases for each situation. Then just relax and communicate using these phrases. Again I recommend a period of a few months work at www.thelinguist.com to bring your skills up to speed. You can get a free week including writing correction and full coaching services. Check it out.

[Patrick]

The most comfortable situation for me to speak in English is to speak with neither native speakers nor Chinese, such as Koreans or Russians.

This is because that I think both of us have the same goal or need working on the English, and we have to speak in the common language so we can understand each other.

[Guest]

I always feel comfortable to speak English with some one i know very well. However, when I chill with my native-English-spoken friends, I'd rather be a listener in most of time. Because I have no idea about what they are talking sometimes. To be silence is not only because the words (slang or something) they are using, but also it is difficult for me, have totally different cultural background, to be involved into the topic. For instance, I do not know who is Simpson, I have never watched the movie or read the novel they did, etc. Nevertheless, I am eager to pick up my English as fast as I could to narrow the *gap between me and my friends. I think English is more like a logical way to think than a language itself.

Steph

[Steve]

Very intresting comments from Patrick and Steph.

Yes it is more comfortable to speak English to other non-native speakers. It is even more comfortable to speak to yourself in English, and you should also do so. Both are useful forms of practice and less stressful than talking to the native speaker.

Speaking to the native speaker is the real test, and the level of competence you must aim for. It is the real game, not just practice. Often the native speaker speaks more quickly and more idiomatically.

To feel more comfortable speaking with the native speaker you need to practice. That is why I put so much emphasis on stress free and enjoyable listening and reading. Choose content of interest and listen to it and read it over and over. Observe the key words and phrases that you are going to need. Learn them systematically, as in The Linguist. Practice writing, where there is less pressure to perform. By all means speak to yourself and to other non-native speakers to practice. Then go back to the native speaker with more confidence.

You cannot possibly know all the in-jokes and references to pop culture that the native speaker will bring up. Don't even worry about it. I don't watch the Simpsons. Focus on content that matters to you or that you find interesting. If that happens to be the Simpsons, fine. Record it. Find a book on it. Work on it. But if there are things in English that interest you more, focus on those things. Learn to enjoy what you can do, and not to worry about what you cannot do.